ecology of man

the pope says i am responsible
for the destruction of the rainforest,
little butterflies with bright wings dying;
others say the war in iraq is my fault
soldiers expiring, the heaving of a thousand mothers wet on my neck

there's fraud folded into my skin
i'm an illegal immigrant from the land of girl
and i think i might have caused
the disintegration of the ecology of man
'cause i believe in blurry borders, and
my strange chest exhaling freezes civilizations

nomadic, i collect geography on my skin
like the dew of an aftershower:
ridges of maine and flecks of new england spittle, colorado sun;
the mist on the mirror hiding
the bermuda triangle between my legs

on the freeway there's jesus on the back of a car
and the driver is deflating with age,
wrinkled woman who doesn't have to swallow tears whole
when people call her she.
i think of the rainbow i wear with fear, swaddled
in dark clouds whispering knives trailing down my throat,
my queer shoulders1, my sex --

and the old laughlined pastor in midwestern mountains,
excommunicated for the sin of accepting my people,
writes that my mismatched body is a blessing, not a disguise
and still holds his wife's hand and thinks of his two children before he sleeps
i hold my own fraudulent hands steady
and face Judgment every day

1 reference to dallas marie spitzer's "my queer shoulders"



February 2012

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